When Your Doctor Tells You That You Gained Too Much During PregnancyMay 15th

So I had an OB appointment a week or so ago. Everything was the same old routine: checking weight, vitals, measuring, and then listening to the baby’s heartbeat. Everything was the same except my regular doctor was out for the day.

Filling in for him was paunchy Dr. Patronizing, OBGYN.

I knew I was in for it when the first thing he asked me was if I knew how much weight I had gained already.

“No,” I said. I’ve been trying to not obsess this time around and so I only weigh myself at the doctor’s office.

“You’ve gained 25 pounds, and you’re at 28 weeks. Thats about as much as we want to see you gain in 40 weeks.”

I felt the pin-pricks of sweat beginning to gather on my neck and scalp.

He’s going to lecture me about weight gain. Don’t cry. Don’t run out. And please God, don’t let my stomach growl.

I sat through a ten minute monologue where he asked me rhetorical questions like,

Do you understand why it’s important to exercise?

When you walk, do you try to walk fast?

Do you want to have even more weight to lose after the baby is born?

And, my personal favorite: Can you just stop eating so much?

As the questions grew more and more ridiculous the fear of crying completely evaporated. In fact, it was replaced with a fear of striking the pompous windbag.

I sat on my fists and let the raging blood pump loud enough to drown out his saccharine voice.

When he was finally finished I waddled my “fat” butt as “fast” as I could out of the office. I had about thirty things going through my mind when I found my husband and went straight into his arms.

Since that dismal day when I learned I gained too much during pregnancy, I’ve hashed it out with a bunch of peeps. They all agree he’s full of it. I asked some of my blog friends to weigh in with what they would have said were they in my shoes. I kinda hope this lecture happens again just so I can use one or two of these.

overweight and pregnant

1.) “Maybe I’m not gaining too much weight, maybe the baby is. Are you calling my baby fat?” Funny is Family

2.) “I’m glad you brought this up, Doctor, because I’ve been meaning to talk to YOU about YOUR weight…”  649point133.com

3.) It’s my big, wet, beautiful uterus and milk-makin’ chi-chis, and I think they’re doing just fine.  Let Me Start By Saying

4.)  “If I wanted to feel fat, I’d have picked up a copy of US Weekly.”  Bad Parenting Moments

5.) “Sir, I can be insulted at home without a copay.” 649point133.com

6.) “So you’re saying I shouldn’t keep my dumbbells in my vagina? Was just trying to work on those Kegels!” Sisterhood of Sensible Moms

7.) “I’m sorry, I think I misheard you. Did you just call me fat? Because I was thinking of calling you a credential-less quack, but I assumed we weren’t doing that out loud.” Nicole Leigh Shaw…Tyop Artist

8.) “The scale said what? That can’t be right. Here, let me just kick off my shoes… Oh, dear. I’m sorry. Did my foot just hit you in your special place? That was totally an “accident.” Binkies and Briefcases

9.) “Gosh. Have I gained weight? Maybe it’s because I’m making a person…what’s the last thing you made? A sandwich? Nice.” Motherhood, WTF

10.) “So you want me to go on a diet?” Me.

Special thanks to all my friends who have encouraged me and made me laugh at the experience. Pregnancy is such a trying time, physically AND emotionally. I’m glad that we women can band together and get each other through it!

If you want to read about what its like to go shopping as a preggo read 20 Steps: Clothes Shopping While Pregnant

If you want to look on the bright side read The Top 7 Things About Being Pregnant

Looking for Maternity Fashion inspiration? Check out 3 Great Pregnancy Outfits

 

 

22 Responses to When Your Doctor Tells You That You Gained Too Much During PregnancyMay 15th

  1. Crystal Andrews May 16, 2014 at 1:10 pm #

    I love this post! Hilarious! Although I bet during the doctor visit, it was not funny at all. I agree, just as all people and children are different sizes at the same age, so are all pregnant moms and their babies after they are born. When my daughter was a baby she breastfed a lot and I supplemented with formula. I fed that baby every time she cried so she was a healthy, chubby, cute baby. Can you believe strangers would come up to me and ask “Omg! What do you feed that baby?” I learned not to care what people thought. Now my daughter is 5 and shes at a healthy weight/size. She’s just taller than most kids her age. :)

  2. Crystal Andrews May 16, 2014 at 1:14 pm #

    Also, I am pretty sure I gained more than 25 pounds (probably 50) during my pregnancy and after she was born, I lost all the extra weight within a month or two, but even if you don’t who cares, you are supposed to gain weight when you’re pregnant. I would complain about that substitute doctor if I were you!

  3. Amy - Funny Is Family May 16, 2014 at 1:27 pm #

    I still hate that guy. Screw him. You’re gorgeous, and I’m not just saying that because you’re my friend. I’m saying that because I have eyes and a brain.

  4. Megan May 16, 2014 at 11:18 pm #

    OMG I want to go tell him off for you right now!!! I can’t tell you how many times my wonderful amazing husband stood up for me to my midwife. She was all into this eating vegetarian thing and said “did you know you could actually not gain anything during pregnancy?” (I was some overweight to start out with), and kept fussing about my weight despite the fact I gained nothing until halfway through my second trimester. My grand total gain at the last appointment before giving birth was 33 lbs. I felt like that was pretty good considering my mom gained twice that when she was pregnant with me as a 19 year old formerly on her high school swim team. Also did I mention I have a sluggish thyroid?

    The true irony was reading a book she lent me from her library by Ina May Gaskin who specifically said to be wary of any healthcare provider who encouraged gaining LESS THAN 25-30 lbs. Heh.

  5. Gabriella L. May 17, 2014 at 1:28 am #

    This is why I only see female doctors. I know that there are some wonderfully sentive male doctors out there, but always manage to run into the one’s who should have been veterinarians instead of OBGYNs! I had a similar experience during my 2nd trimester with a doctor standing in for mine. When he started talking to me as if I were a sack of meat on the table. I stopped him in his tracks, told him to work on his bedside manner, got off the table and went to reschedule my appointment. That was it for me! I really hope you report him to your regular doctor. He was rude, arrogant, and insensitive!!

    #SitsSharefest

    • hillary May 17, 2014 at 1:09 pm #

      Dang, girl! You have guts! Good for you for leaving. I need to be more ballsy.

  6. Elvira May 17, 2014 at 2:46 am #

    I gained A LOT during pregnancy and somewhere halfway, my female obgyn gave me some dvd-rom about eating healthy during pregnancy. It was clearly meant for foreign people with only very little knowledge of my mother tongue and a totally different cultural background. After a few weeks I was so clearly a water balloon she hasn’t said anything since. I lost it all within two months, one more proof that it was all water I was retaining. I would have hated I lecture!

    • hillary May 17, 2014 at 1:08 pm #

      I’ve gained 50 both times. And it comes off fast. Because it really is mostly water.

  7. Shauna Lynn May 17, 2014 at 3:17 am #

    This happened to me too! My OBYGN said I gained a little more than the 25lbs they wanted me too…….I gained 50 lbs. I just shrugged and said “What an I say, I like to eat….or I mean my baby likes to eat”!

    • hillary May 17, 2014 at 1:08 pm #

      Sometimes you just NEED to eat. Its about the only pleasure we get for nine months.

  8. Heather May 17, 2014 at 7:28 am #

    Oh my gosh I’m so happy I found this post – hilarious! Just think, that guy probably has a wife … Poor girl.

    • hillary May 17, 2014 at 1:07 pm #

      Yep. Lets hope she walks “fast.”

  9. Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms May 17, 2014 at 7:55 am #

    You are gorgeous. He is lucky someone hasn’t knocked his head off. Xoxo Ellen

    • hillary May 17, 2014 at 1:07 pm #

      Ellen, I wish you could be my OB :)

  10. Kathleen at Middletini May 17, 2014 at 8:34 am #

    The same darn thing happened to me! The doctor said, “If it tastes good, spit it out.” I just started laughing hysterically, then said, “You realize I’m going to go get a donut right after this just to spite you, right?” He thought I was kidding. I wasn’t.

    • hillary May 17, 2014 at 1:06 pm #

      Ha! So glad you said that hahaha!

  11. Tammy May 17, 2014 at 10:51 am #

    LOL This made me laugh. So funny. I gained like 60 lbs this past pregnancy…. NOT ideal but whatever. It’s pregnancy and I am half way through getting if off already so here’s to what I should have weighed at birth and being there right now… 3 months after birth. LOL Stopping by from SITS Sharefest!

    • hillary May 17, 2014 at 1:06 pm #

      Glad it made you laugh :) I think the women who actually only gain 25 lbs are in the like 2% of all pregnant women.

  12. Jennifer May 17, 2014 at 11:08 am #

    Finding a supportive OBGYN during your pregnancy is so important to keep you sane. Sorry you got a duche for a stand in. I gained a lot of weight during my pregnancy and my Dr. told me that it was ok because I could afford to gain some for myself too. (I gained 54 lbs total!)

    • hillary May 17, 2014 at 1:05 pm #

      That’s a nice Dr :)

  13. MJ @ Daisy & June May 17, 2014 at 6:48 pm #

    Stopping by from the link up! I had several drs like this until my fourth pregnancy I finally got a Dr who told me flat out – we would never talk about my weight until it was a serious problem. I gained 50 pounds with my fourth and he never said a peep <3

  14. Brandie February 12, 2015 at 4:36 pm #

    I am nearly 30 weeks, and I get this lecture EVERYTIME I have an appointment. I eat well, and exercise. Before I was pregnant, I was underweight, so I gained quite a bit once I was starving every moment of the day. It’s so frustrating to hear you’re gaining too much. Back off! I’ve passed my glucose test and my blood pressure is perfect every visit. There comes a point when you start to shrug even before you step off the scale. I’ve even told my OB… “Before you say something…I’ve done everything I can besides not eating.” I feel like if anything makes my blood pressure rise, it’s the barrage of lecturing I get with the assumption that I’m not doing what I’m supposed to.

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