2.) Write a proposal for a kids’ show you could actually stand to watch.
I have five proposals for kid shows I think would be worth watching…I couldn’t decide on just one:
1.) Survivor: Nickelodeon Stars
The stars of iCarly, Hannah Montanna, Victorious, Big Time Rush, and Spongebob will compete for immunity in challenges that test their physical, mental, and emotional capabilities. Losers are voted off…their TV shows are canceled and they must send me a hefty sum of money for the mental and emotional damages I’ve accrued from seven years worth of exposure.
2.) Wipeout: Kid Edition
No explanation needed.
3.) The Real Children of Canada
Canada. Is. Amazing. A culture filled with history, food, song, and dance…so rich you can almost taste it. And so memorable…you almost can’t remember it. The children of Canada are a species one might spend hours observing. What is it about the way they were raised that made them as Canadian as they are? How difficult was it for them to learn Canadian? And most importantly what are they doing to their bacon to make it so…Canadian?
A documentary filming these interesting specimens of the human race is long overdue.
4.) Child Swap: Africa
We’re often coming down on our children about the state of the children in Africa. The food we waste, the water we leave running, the incessant need for “more” of everything. “There are children in Africa dying for water and just look at you wasting all this!”
Well now they can experience this life first hand. With Child Swap Africa Edition our kids will finally get to experience what it’s really like to go without and they will return to us feeling grateful, cultured, and less whiny.
5.) The Adopter
The Adopter is a kid friendly version of The Bachelor. An infertile couple is placed in a house filled with 25 children. Each day the couple is given an opportunity to “get to know” the children better via group dates and one on one time alone. At the end of each episode the children selected to move on will receive a rose. Those not selected will need to immediately say goodbye, pack their bags and leave the mansion. At the end of the difficult journey The Adopter will award one lucky child the final rose and a “forever home”. Their family will finally be complete.
I’m thinking with the addition of these shows in the Fall…the year might be off to a really great start.
Tonya says
OMG, these made me laugh out loud. I would totally watch The Adopter.
Classic NYer says
Actually, that sounds more interesting than the Bachelor, haha!
Kim says
I am still laughing… you must have Canada on the mind with your Hawaiian pizza :) Canadians are the funniest people I’ve ever known. We lived in B.C. for two years and it took me two years to get used to the fact that everyone up there has a sense of humor. Even kids tell jokes.
I think my favorite for myself of your shows is the Child Swap: Africa, seriously wondering what it would be like to see the difference, but then I don’t know if I’d want my children to be in the show, they might start pointing out that I need to go without.
My girls would probably choose Survivor: Nickelodeon Stars, because they are really into their Wii boxing and sword fighting games right now, as well as Dora and the Nick Jr. gang.
June Freaking Cleaver says
What kid wouldn’t like Wipeout?
The Adopter could work, but I think you could combine the idea about the Africa Swap – let our whiny children see that other parents won’t understand them, either.
Two weeks at my house and your kids would be on you like lint on a pair of black polyester pants.
dysfunctional mom says
Ha! Love it. I’d watch. In fact I have some kids to nominate for The Adopter……
Simone @Greatfun4kids says
LOVE it.
Child Swap Africa would be a big hit in our house.
Can we volunteer/nominate a few kids while we’re at it?
I know a few….
And that Survivor twist… have you called Jeff yet?
xx
{PS hope you like My “Ten Worst mothering Moments and What i learned from them…”}
Jessica says
The question is which one of these shows will you star in?
cam says
You had me at Survivor: Nickelodeon Stars! The Adopter actually sounds completely doable.
Shana'e says
Child Swap Africa definitely. Except, I think it should be for kids between the ages of 12 and 16 (17??). (Little ones might miss their mommies too much and it might just be a bit overwhelming for them.)
I really think that it WOULD help them appreciate all that they have. The simplest of things in their life that they take for granted every day.
Hillary says
Yah…the Adopter. Fantastic.
Karen and Gerard says
I think that swap Africa would be a hit. I also like your adopter show idea, but think it might be really hard for the children not chosen. Maybe there should be a way where the audience can call to adopt them too or at the very least, they should be all treated to a great trip somewhere–perhaps a cruise or Disneyland.
Life As Wife says
I’m. Dying. There are no words!!! Hahah
Teacher Girl says
I would watch these! “Survivor: Nickelodeon Stars” is my fave. I would pay big money to see some of those kids duke it out!
Dumb Mom says
The Adopter sounds awesome as long as there is no tongue kissing. And, I’m all for sending my kids to Africa, although I have to be honest and say that when I threaten them, I say I’m going to send them to boarding school! They are terrified and have no idea that they would probably love freaking boarding school because it would me their mommy and daddy are RICH! I’s love to threaten them with Africa, but they just aren’t that afraid of it. I blame Anthony Bourdain (possibly inappropriate for kid watching, but so much culture!) and various nature shows that omit the starving and focus on the awesome wildlife.
Melissa says
As a Canadian, I feel like I can tell you this secret:
Canadian bacon is nothing more than back bacon, which is nothing more than boneless pork loin (the pigs back).
It is tasty at times though..
erica says
Honestly? I think the Adopter could be a real show. When you see it on TV, we’ll all know it was your idea first!
Ginny Marie says
Brilliant! I’m especially fond of the Survivor concept, but you forgot to add Dora the Explorer. She would totally kick everyone else’s a$$!
Amy says
Love these! Hilarious! I am loving The Adopter.
Roller Coaster says
These are hilarious! So when are you pitching the ideas to a television network? I’m willing to bet at least 1 of the 5 would get picked up. :)
Jessica says
These are hysterical. I seriously don’t know how they find people dumb enough to go on that Wipeout show. Loved your list!
Beth says
I would watch any of these!
Carrie says
Damn, I wish I was younger, I’d so audition for The Real Children of Canada!
The Adopter though, I think THAT is a keeper!!
Diane@BeStillaMinute says
Love number four!
Bibi says
I don’t usually write on blogs but had to on yours. You have a very easy to read wrinitg style. A lot of people don’t have that touch, they just drone on and on in the most boring way. But not you thanks! Thanks again!
Mrs. Weber says
Great job – I would watch all of these shows in a heartbeat. I especially like the Child Swap Africa one since my mom threatened me with that a lot as a kid when I wouldn’t eat my peas…
Katina says
Love Child Swap and the Adopter! You are sooo crazzzzy!
Jenny says
These are hilarious. # 4 especially, I am always telling my son that children in Africa would eat all the dinners I make since he turns his nose up at everything.
Minivan Mama says
Child swap Africa would be AWESOME!
Jen says
Oh man, I hope those shows get picked up and recorded soon. I need to watch them.
Can you use your connections with Ellen to make them happen?
imperfectmomma says
Ok…how wrong is it that I am really loving that idea for Wipeout Kids edition? ;)
Runnermom-jen says
Hahaha! I would watch all of those! Great ideas…you should probably get an agent or something ;)
tori says
The Itty Bitty Wipe Out needs to happen immediately.
Angie says
The Adopter and Child Swap Africa actually sound much better than the shows I’ve seen on TV recently. I’d DVR them!
Life in Lusaka says
Unfortunately we can’t use the starving kids in Africa line, cos we’re in Africa! lol
Carri says
I’m thinking that, instead of being voted off Survivor, the cast members are thrown into a lion cage. Just sayin’.
Peg says
I would watch those shows! I especially liked survivor and Africa Child Swap. Hilarious.
Anne says
Kid edition of Wipeout – hilarious. You should pitch these to the networks!
Susanna@Susanna Leonard Hill says
I’ll watch Child Swap and The Adopter :)
Vanessa says
The adopter is definitely a great idea! :) I know a few friends that might want to go on that show.
Ashley says
I love “The Adopter” :)
Katie says
I would watch Survivor and Child Swap, though I do not have any candidates. Very Funny.
morgan says
I would definitely watch the Adopter … if only to see the horror on the couple’s faces as they get into the nitty-gritty of having kids. 25 of them.
Christi says
My 11 year old has often complained about the fact that she is not old enough for Wipeout. She would LOVE to be on the kids edition!
Dead Cow Girl says
Survivor Nickelodeon. Awesome. I don’t know who I hope gets voted off first.
Kim @The Fordeville Diaries says
I love these. Now I’m wondering if we can morph “Survivor: Nickelodeon Stars” with “Intervention” or “Celebrity Rehab” when all these child stars grow up. I have a sneaking suspicion we could start sooner than later with those secretly-30-something-year-olds from The Fresh Beat Band.
Kisatrtle says
Oh crap. My shows arent kids shows. Epic fail for messing up the prompt. BTW i love the african child swap
Timeless Creations says
LOVE Kids Wipeout lol
I was thinking something along the lines of Jersey Shore, only with kids & their juice cups?
Angie says
Of course I LOVE this list, who wouldn’t?!
I WISH I had time to participate in this week’s workshop. Maybe next week….I really miss the connections and fun reading. THANKS!
Marta says
I would totally watch the Adopter, that sounds like genius.
Robin @ Farewell, Stranger says
Love those! I could NOT think of one I would actually watch. Max & Ruby has scarred me forever.
If you want to make the Canadian one I’ll offer up my kid ;)
Mimzy Wimzy says
Love it! How about a twist on the adoption show… have older adoptable kids choosing from 25 families!
Galit Breen says
Okay, too funny! I can’t decide which I’d DVR first- Canada? The adopter? Wipeout? too hard to choose! :)
Mama Track says
These are awesome. Can’t decide which I would want to watch the most. And they ALL sound better than Dora and Diego. “I’m the map, I’m the map, I’m the map….”
jackie says
Hahaha! I would so watch these!
Alicia says
OH MY GOSH!!! One of your best posts! When I LITERALLY LOL (vs. in my head LOL) it’s a WINNER! Thank you for that!
Angie@MamaInsomnia says
I propose the kids from Toddler and Tiara’s are the first group sent over to Africa…
bcIMthemommy says
My children are ready for their TV debut on The Adopter. Where do I sign them up?
Raine says
I would LOVE Wipeout: kids edition. Seriously. I cant stop thinking about it :D
Jennie says
OMG I love the Survivor and Wipeout kids editions! I would watch…and laugh! Great list!
Dead Cow Girl says
Just had to come back and say that the Adopter is still freaking me out. I’m thinking it’s just too close to something that TLC might actually do.
Paula Kiger says
I like your suggestions!!! I was always grateful (when my kids were little) that some genius writers put some double entendres into the most dull of kids movies so the adults who were there would have something to grasp on to for a little enjoyment!!!!
Tania says
haha I love this I would definately watch those shows!
Andrea says
OK so my 5 year old would be the first in line for kid sized Wipeout! I hate that show,but he loves it.
Patty Ann says
Yep, I really wish I could watch some of those shows!!
Jennifer says
Can you imagine how over the top emotional the The Adopter would be? There is probably a network right now checking to see if this is legal.
Sister Sister says
I love #4 and #5. I would watch these for sure.
CoffeeJitters says
I love the real children of canada idea. I mean really, how do they produce so many comedians?
Ms Sharealot says
What a great list! Kids shows are so unbelievably educational (boring) and clean (stupid) that I could NOT figure out what to do with the prompt!
lisa, too! says
love your ideas for shows… the africa one is AWESOME!!! (but probably considered child abuse… boo!) a little late this week, but trying to get back in the game! woohoo!
Plagota says
love number four