Brag Letters

Well, Christmas is over and New Year’s is around the corner. That means we all have a tad bit more time left to shoot out those late Christmas cards. Aunt Gloria, I totally had yours addressed, stamped, and everything–it just DID NOT get in the mail :/ It’s coming though. It is. Because I still have roughly a week to get it out.

Does ettiquete allow for “New Years” cards to trickle in throughout the month of January? I don’t know…

Did anyone get any brag letters? Did anyone send out any brag letters? I don’t think brag letters are in vogue anymore, at least not for my age demographic. We have different sorts of brag letters–less talking, more showing (i.e. facebook, blogs, perfectly composed Christmas pictures–see last week’s post).

My parents still get brag letters. They never sent any. Unless you’re the Duggers, large families don’t usually facilitate great brag letters. There’s always that stray hair, that black sheep–that one episode that will totally throw off the perfect groove. You just can’t hide things in big families.

Growing up, we always enjoyed receiving the brag letters. Usually a long revelry of mocking and ridiculing would ensue. It would make us feel better about ourselves.

Anyways, one of my friends (who wishes to remain anonymous) sent out her own version of a brag letter. I loved it. It really gave me something to think about–hope you guys enjoy it like I did.

Hi everyone,

This year God has truly blessed our household. My husband who is perfect in every way, even his hair stays in place while playing tennis at the club (The Ritz Club of course), just got a promotion that gave us a six-figure income. Hawaii, here we come!!

Our four children were head of their class—again. One is the school president, the other is head of the cheerleading squad, one helps the principal make important decisions and the youngest has been chosen to be the valedictorian for the senior class even though he is a freshman-he is just too smart for his young years. 

And don’t forget Fido. He won every competition we entered him in this year. Best Groomed Dog was one that we were most proud of. Oh me? Yes, I still fit into my wedding dress of 25 years ago (size 1) and I receive many invitations to share my wonderful life and all that God has showered us with—and it is a lot, I am sure part of the reason is because we tithe 30% to our church and I did buy one of those hankies from the faith healer who travels through town. 

God is so pleased with us. He can be with you also, just give me a call and for $500 I will come and speak to your club or organization. I hope all you are Merry like I am Merry.

 Love and kisses,

Junie

 Jingle bells, Jingle bells

A Christmas letter from Paul 

Hi everyone,

I am sending this letter to encourage all of you to continue to follow Jesus. I am currently with James, Barnabas and Stephanas. We have had quite a time on the road. You would think there was a death sentence on our head.

In each town we seem to be a spectacle to the world, to angels and to men.We are weak and put to shame everywhere we go. At this very hour we hunger and thirst. Our clothes stink and nothing matches. We are homeless and the locals are throwing rocks at us. But we still find labor and are blessed each night with some bread.

This last year I was three times beaten with rods: I was once stoned: I suffered three shipwrecks and was left bobbing in the ocean night and day. I thank the Lord that Barnabas is a good swimmer.  While on our journeys we faced danger from robbers, our own nation, the Gentiles, false brothers, the city life and the wilderness. We often went without food and were exposed to the cold with little to cover ourselves from its bitterness. 

 One time the king was about to seize me but some friends threw me over the wall in a basket—that was a wild ride! James was laughing the whole time while we were fleeing from the king’s horsemen.

 Running out of ink to write with so we will leave you with this exhortation.When reviled, we bless; when persecuted, we endure; when slandered, we entreat. We have become, and are still, like the scum of the world, the refuse of all things.

Merry Christmas. My love is with you all, in union with the Messiah Yeshua. Stephanas is writing this for me because my eyesight was damaged this year from the beatings.

Yours always in the faith, 

Paul

Jingle All the Way