So…we’re moving this week.
Every time I say that to myself it feels as if I’m simultaneously punched in the gut while downing a shot of tequila. Painful, invigorating, and a little nausea to boot.
I feel that this move is the biggest one of my life thus far. I said that when we moved here, but I had no idea what kind of life would take place here.
I’m not gonna lie, the three years we’ve lived in good old Davis, CA have been some of the hardest in my life. And that’s saying something, cause high school was a doozy.
To briefly recap:
We moved here without knowing a soul.
We downsized–majorly. From 1200 square feet to 620 all in one big blow.
We discovered life with no dishwasher, no washing machine, and–the final rub–no garbage disposal.
I gave birth–naturally–to my second child three weeks after moving.
My husband started a brand new Ph.D. program.
We were poor.
I got depressed.
I got sick.
I had three surgeries in five months.
I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis.
We were so poor.
Top ramen and pb&j poor.
We made amazing friends who were also surviving grad life.
We learned what community feels like.
We all survived together.
That’s it in a nutshell. Now do you see why I’m so sick about closing this chapter? It was huge. It was the chapter in a book where characters change and move forward. Where new obstacles are introduced and overcome. Where the setting is so in sync with events that you cannot tell the one from the other.
It was a major chapter in my life.
How is it over?
Saying goodbye to this place and the people here is so. so. hard.
But I guess that’s how you know you truly lived in a place. If you can fly in and out with no jolt of emotion, no stab of nostalgia then something big did not happen.
I’m glad that life–nitty gritty-hard-crazy-terrible-shocking-fun-inventive-purposeful-raw-mundane-extraordinary-ridiculous-abundantly full life happened here. Isn’t that the way it should be?
Have you ever experienced an “end-of-chapter” kind of move? What did you learn from it?
I have had moves like that. And while they were scary, it was a relief to move away from the constant reminders of the tough times.
wow, I had no idea you guys lived small too! we’ve definitely got more space than that, but we’ve been really working at minimizing. love the way you wrote this post, definitely identify with it in a lot of ways. I hate long transitions where you have to prepare and do a lot of lasts and say a lot of good-byes and stuff. I’d rather be less dramatic about everything and just leave. I always just want to be on the other side of it all. before long you’ll be having new adventures… gotta embrace the journey, right?
Oh yes… many of those moves. They are so very difficult because they stir all the emotion of the seasons and life moments that mattered. You are leaving a part of you behind, and a big part of your journey will be “past”. When I was 30 years old, I left my perfect and amazingly fulfilling job and life to travel cross country (and into Canada) 9000 miles with a guy-friend I adored and he knew the way to every canyon and river and mountain. We traveled through parts of this country I never knew existed. I climbed mountains and canoed rivers and handled the Canyonlands, Mt Robson, and Mt. Wheeler, as the most difficult challenge of my life, to date. By far, the greatest risk I ever took… and I knew this was a turning point in my life… because I knew when I came back, I would be coming to a new home in Ohio.
Before I left for my “turning 30 embrace life NOW” trip… I had packed everything I owned and stored it in Ohio. I left my home, Chicago- (so many seasons and life moments that mattered) and directed my path toward my sister and her family, full well knowing I wanted to raise a family near- my family. I knew I would settle there. My days of twenty-something fun were over in the city. Turning point of my life. But as tough as it was to say goodbye to my life and start anew… it was in His Plan. I actually wrote a song about this entire enlightened idea (my first gospel!!)- a song I later taught many different children in many schools in Ohio, as a music teacher.
As your life turns a corner into where you are to go… always remember, His Plan is perfect. ????
The most beautiful journeys are sometimes the hardest. On to your next big adventure.
Yes, we have definitely had that end-of-chapter move! My husband and I lived in North Carolina for 4 years before we moved to Arkansas. North Carolina for us represents a special season for sure! That’s where we went to seminary, where our daughter was born, and where we gained some direction in life. When we moved to Arkansas, I was 7 months pregnant with our son (with no insurance) and Josh was applying for grad school (again ;). I still look back on that move …and that year …and smile. Moves are so hard though! ….be thinking of you during this transition!
Coming from someone who has done crazy moves to support husband and career, all there is to say is “On to the next one!” If life isn’t meant to be an ongoing adventure full of uncertainty and awesomeness, then what is it?
Great attitude! I’m ready!
You have so many friends and memories where you are, yet you have a new and exciting phase where you are headed. Prayers and excitement for you and what the future holds, Hill.
Absolutely! I have learned so much about the Lord here ????
Holy cow- it’s been a whirlwind for you! Thank you for sharing the ride with us! Your new adventure is beginning- go get ’em!
Wow- you are a survivor for sure! Are you going to England for your husband’s studies? Life keeps chucking fruit at our heads, doesn’t it?
You’re adorable, with beautiful children and a wonderful family- that’s what matters, right?
Moving has always been like a fresh start for our family. Best Wishes! I like your blog a lot. Can’t wait to see what new happy adventures come your way.
Thank you so much!
Oh, I love it – all of those feelings are really the way you know something happened. Best of luck in your move!